


Dancing on the shadow's edge

by SublimeShadows (RohansGirl)



Category: League of Legends
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Childhood Trauma, Gen, Kayn has DID - Dissociative Identity Disorder, Mental Health Issues, Mentions of past abuse, Slice of Life, but then you remember this is a league fic so it's okay, err more tags to come, many mentally unstable people, maybe ooc idk, of sorts I'm no medic, seriously i'm writing as i go so i have no idea yet
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 06:55:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29328141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RohansGirl/pseuds/SublimeShadows
Summary: In which Kayn has to heal his mind assisting to group therapy while living with Jhin as a roomie and mental health mentor. They have a cat. And issues. And League of Legends is just Kayn's self indulgent fantasy.[Just as this fic is my self indulgent work btw]
Relationships: Shieda Kayn & Khada Jhin, Shieda Kayn & Zed, it's too early to know leave me alone
Comments: 4
Kudos: 8





	Dancing on the shadow's edge

**Author's Note:**

> Sooooooooooooooooo. Yeah. I have no idea what this is. All I know is that I can't get my m6 with Jhin or Kayn so I'm pissed and I wanna feel like I'm good for something.
> 
> Expect some lore nods, and maybe... maybe League music bands bcs why not.
> 
> Also, everyone's just human unless I say otherwise.
> 
> Also, maybe my grammar is messed up because english is my second language, so I apologize for any errors.

The task was rather simple. At least he knew it should be, but the page was blank in front of him, and it had been like that for about three hours.

" _ **This is crap.**_ "

The whole task was crap and Kayn knew it from the start, but that wasn't helpful at all.

"Shut up, Rhaast."

" _ **We're wasting our time here, there are so many things we could be doing, like... Eating. Hunting.**_ "

To ignore him was the best response, even though it was easier said than done. From the living room, subtle piano notes arose, and for a moment, Kayn was confused. He frowned and stood, taking his phone to check the time.

11:30PM was too early for him to go to bed, but usually too late for Jhin to go to work. He went to the living room then, hoping for a thief or something worse, but all he saw was his roommate. He was sitting in front of the huge grand piano with Yuumi curled up on a fur ball right beside him, eyes closed and fingers dancing over the keys. The sight was calming in a way, but Kayn wasn't ready to admit it. Even so, the sole presence of the other man was odd enough to raise some brows.

"What the... What are you doing here?" he asked, visibly disconcerted. As soon as the music came to a violent and disonant stop, he knew that speaking at him in that very moment was probably one of the worst ideas he'd ever had.

"I was focusing. Where can I be at peace but at my own home? That was before you came in to disrupt that peace, of course". Jhin's voice sounded irritated, but he always sounded the same anyway, so Kayn wasn't really sure about how much he'd messed up the ambience. Not that he cared that much. 

"Okay, I'll just leave." He turned to go back to his room, but Jhin cleared his throat, which made Kayn turn back to face him.

"You have disturbed me already, so you better make it count."

" _ **Can we just kick him in the face?**_ "

The idea was tempting for sure, but Kayn knew better. He shrugged and looked away, getting lost in his thoughts for a few seconds.

"I have to make a list," he said after, placing the blank paper over the piano keys, "the problem is that I have nothing to list about this particular topic."

The page header was printed, a simple title reading a simple phrase.

Things I have to improve about myself

Jhin's laugh echoed through the room, loud and clear, the most amused Kayn had heard him ever since living together.

"You have lots of things to improve, child." There was some sort of tenderness in his words, which made Kayn tremble. It felt weird, like a snake dancing to enchant its prey. "You could start by improving your ability to lie."

Rhaast's reaction was way more raging than Kayn's, luckily, no one else could hear him. Even if he managed to escape Kayn's hold, Jhin wouldn't pay attention to the stream of insults that accompanied his name, or the punches that would land on his face. Most possible scenario was recieving himself a hit or two.

"I have no need to lie," he answered. That was the biggest lie of the entire galaxy, of course.

"You lie to yourself every single day, at every single hour." Jhin closed the piano's lid, signaling the ending of his playing session, but his hands remained over the instrument. He fixed his gaze over the younger man, not a trace of amusement on his face anymore. "You think you're too smart, smart enough to disguise it somehow, and maybe, just maybe, you can fool your father, your friends, perhaps even your therapists... but not me." The sweet smile that appeared in Jhin's lips was scary on its own way. It wasn't menacing or fake, but still carried that silent warning. This was a man you wouldn't want to mess up with.

"I'm not lying to you, you idiot." He tried to sound as convincing as he could, but as soon as Jhin rested his head over the piano, Kayn knew his efforts weren't good enough.

"I can see him," Jhin said in a whisper, a secret that was only meant for Kayn to hear, "whenever he speaks to you, you lower your eyes and start twitching your left fingers." He mimicked the motion and, even through his shock, Kayn knew he was right. Rhaast wasn't so accepting.

" _ **Let me out, Kayn. I can take him down.**_ " The sensation overpowered Kayn for a second. It was always the same. It felt like being stabbed trough the chest with an enormous and sharped blade, he could feel it in his body, legs trembling and cold shivers running along his spine. Soon he was out of air, and even as he tried to breath deeply, it didn't take long for his head to start spinning. His vision got blurry, a sharp pain piercing his head. " _ **Imagine how beautiful it'll be to feel his guts on our hands...**_ "

That was the reason Kayn played with his left fingers; every time Rhaast tried to get away from Kayn's hold, the right hand was one of the first things to go. He could not feel it anymore, but it was moving, and lay against the wall took all of his will. Almost half of his body was trying to reach Jhin.

However, there was no need for Kayn to get closer, because Jhin himself got to him, pressing his cheeks with both hands.

"See? He's never gone." A slap landed onto his cheek, and for just one moment he was able to see Jhin's face clearly. He looked rather calm, which was dreadful given the fact that he knew what Kayn had done the last time Rhaast took over. "But this is your body. You have to fight for it, child."

" _ **Don't listen to him, just give in. I'll take care of everything.**_ " The fun part was that, even when he tried to sound trustworthy, Rhaast still sounded like a monster. Kayn was able to see him, right behind his own mind, pressing his throat with one massive hand while trying to push him back.

"Just listen to my voice, Kayn." Jhin's voice, on the other hand, was soothing. Inviting. In a way, Kayn was thankful that Rhaast sounded so harsh and unreliable. If it were Jhin's voice inside his head, only god knew what kind of atrocities would be rising in that very instant. "Do you want to sleep for weeks?"

"N-no..." For sure he didn't, but it didn't seem to matter that much. He felt like being dragged from the shore by a wave, something he couldn't control, something too strong for him. But it turned out to be Jhin dragging him to the couch, forcing him to sit down before pressing a cushion to the younger's hands. 

"Feel the texture. Do it." The order was firm, and he tried to oblige, his left being the most responsive. "Focus on that. Breathe. You can overpower him."

" _ **You can't. Why are you listening to this prick? I'm the reason you are alive!**_ "

"He's telling you to ignore me, isn't him? But who's the one touching you right now, Kayn?" Jhin's hand pressed Kayn's shoulder with all his strength, but even in that situation, he looked calm. Kayn envied him so much. Sight went back to normal, slow but sure, and after throwing a massive tantrum, Rhaast disappeared in the depths of his head, leaving him practically melted on the couch.

"Well, at least you're still here... I guess." Satisfaction was clear in Jhin's voice, and once the whole turmoil was over for good, Yuumi landed on Kayn's lap, purring and massaging his legs before getting ready to sleep.

"Ugh. It's so... annoying." Kayn sighed, closing his eyes. Headache remained, but the cat helped a lot. He caressed her, and with a small _prr_ , she curled up and fell asleep. Jhin came back with a pill and water, and Kayn swallowed it without hesitation.

"You need to learn to ignore it." Again, easier said than done. "It won't be long before they notice he's still around and kicking."

"I know. But what can I do?" he asked. He felt tired, both physically and mentally. He felt his eyelids falling, and sure enough, having Yuumi asleep over him was tempting him to sleep in that same spot. Kayn tried to stay awake, but a few minutes later, Jhin stood and left only to return with a blanket, which he placed over his roommate.

"You can begin with controlling your temper. He tries to break out when you're angry over something, so that's a good start." Lulled by the warmth of the blanket, Kayn wrapped himself, keeping the kitty between his arms. His eyes closed, and a few moments later, a soft piano melody started, giving him a chance to have a nice dream to pass the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next: Ivern tries to calm down the henhouse. Spoiler: it goes wrong.


End file.
